WEBVTT 00:00:00.009 --> 00:00:04.316 All right, this is Boris Solis, um, interviewing for Creative Push on 00:00:04.349 --> 00:00:11.995 December 17th at 3:12 p.m. Can you say your name and your age? Yeah, um, 00:00:12.028 --> 00:00:17.556 I'm Geraldine Toya and I'm 50 years old. Great. Um, can you just, uh, set 00:00:17.589 --> 00:00:21.276 the stage for us, like tell us, um, maybe where you were born or just a 00:00:21.309 --> 00:00:26.116 little bit about your background? OK, well, according to my mom, I was 00:00:26.149 --> 00:00:32.237 actually born in uh one of uh my my dad's company then. So, um, our 00:00:32.270 --> 00:00:36.116 distance from where we actually go to a hospital is usually um like an 00:00:36.149 --> 00:00:40.487 hour drive. So on the way to the hospital, that's where I was born, but I 00:00:40.520 --> 00:00:47.366 was actually, you know, um. Um, taken to the UNMH Hospital in Albuquerque. 00:00:47.399 --> 00:00:51.856 Um, so it was an hour drive from where? From our Pueblo, which is Jemma 00:00:51.889 --> 00:00:57.237 Pueblo, and our main, um, the main area then was in Albuquerque, so we 00:00:57.270 --> 00:01:01.515 didn't have, you know, the The hospitals that are near us right now, which 00:01:01.548 --> 00:01:07.555 is only like 20-30 minutes now compared to back then that was in '66. Do 00:01:07.588 --> 00:01:11.995 you have sisters and brothers? Yes, I do. I have two brothers and one 00:01:12.028 --> 00:01:16.986 sister, so I'm actually the second child out of four. Wow. So do you 00:01:17.019 --> 00:01:21.217 remember your mom being pregnant with your other siblings? Um, well, we're 00:01:21.250 --> 00:01:27.415 pretty much, um, um, closely, you know, at age, so I think I'm like 2 00:01:27.448 --> 00:01:32.717 years, well, from my older brother, he's between me and him is only 1 year 00:01:32.750 --> 00:01:37.885 and then between me and my other brother after me is 2 years and then the 00:01:37.918 --> 00:01:45.135 sister after. My brothers were like 3 years apart, so did you close? Sorry 00:01:45.168 --> 00:01:50.605 about that. Did you, um, uh, grow up kind of living near your family even 00:01:50.638 --> 00:01:55.406 as you got older? Yes, yes, that's nice. Yes, so it was, you know, and 00:01:55.439 --> 00:02:02.245 then for me, for my part, um, I have 6 children. Yeah, I have 4 girls, 2 00:02:02.278 --> 00:02:07.486 boys, um, but they're actually, um, you know, they're not as close as we 00:02:07.519 --> 00:02:11.646 were when we when we were born, so my oldest to my second oldest is 4 00:02:11.679 --> 00:02:17.245 years apart. Then from my second oldest to the 3rd, next one is, um, 2 00:02:17.278 --> 00:02:22.606 years, and then from the 3rd to the 4th is another 3. The 4th to the 5th 00:02:22.639 --> 00:02:28.207 is another 3 and then the 5th to the 6th, 10 years. Wow. Did you always 00:02:28.240 --> 00:02:36.240 want a big family? I actually did. Um, my husband, um, had, uh, 5 or 6 00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:41.606 siblings as well, so he grew up in a big family, so he was more wanted a 00:02:41.639 --> 00:02:46.025 big family because that's pretty much how he was raised, so. That's what 00:02:46.058 --> 00:02:50.346 we have. So do you remember, um, being pregnant with your first child? Yes 00:02:50.379 --> 00:02:58.379 , yes, um, she Well, me and my husband, we, we, um, we're dating and so 00:03:00.250 --> 00:03:03.967 right after high school we got married, so we've been married for 32 years 00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:09.536 , but we had our oldest when we're still in high school, so we, we had her 00:03:09.569 --> 00:03:15.207 at a young age, but my parents actually wanted to raise her so we can 00:03:15.240 --> 00:03:21.505 continue on our education, but then we felt that. She was our only way of 00:03:21.538 --> 00:03:25.707 being, you know, staying together as a couple, so we didn't give her up, 00:03:25.740 --> 00:03:29.505 we raised her ourselves, you know, and then we actually moved to Dallas 00:03:29.538 --> 00:03:32.827 together and that's where I had my second daughter, so she was born in 00:03:32.860 --> 00:03:36.827 Dallas. Interesting. So were you, did you also have to make that hour 00:03:36.860 --> 00:03:40.626 drive to the hospital when you had your child, your first one? My first 00:03:40.659 --> 00:03:45.495 one, yes, yes, I did because she was born at Presbyterian Hospital and 00:03:45.528 --> 00:03:51.286 that was in downtown in Albuquerque, but I was taken by ambulance. Because 00:03:51.319 --> 00:03:57.207 during then my dad was um an EMT, so he was uh one that got the ambulance 00:03:57.240 --> 00:04:03.475 service in our Pelo so he's the one that actually drove me to the hospital 00:04:03.508 --> 00:04:07.967 in the ambulance. Did you enjoy being pregnant or how was it for you? Well 00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:13.376 , to me, as far as um being young, you know. My mom and my well my parents 00:04:13.409 --> 00:04:18.366 never expected me to have a child early so it pretty much I wasn't um 00:04:18.399 --> 00:04:25.776 informed how pregnancy was or you know um any you know how being pregnant 00:04:25.809 --> 00:04:30.176 was and stuff so I experienced that. I always say I experienced that um in 00:04:30.209 --> 00:04:34.137 the you know hard way because I didn't know anything about the nause you 00:04:34.170 --> 00:04:38.656 know, being nauseated and all this stuff and morning sickness, you know 00:04:38.689 --> 00:04:43.416 what comes with it. The second time around, I was pretty much, you know, 00:04:43.449 --> 00:04:47.856 knew and I was aware of what, what, you know, I can go through. With the 00:04:47.889 --> 00:04:53.377 first birth, did you um take any, an epidural or any medication? Um, yes, 00:04:53.410 --> 00:04:59.046 I did. Oh my God, yes, I did. 00:04:59.079 --> 00:05:04.166 It was an experience. My mom never told me what was gonna come, how it was 00:05:04.199 --> 00:05:08.606 gonna be, but all my kids were natural born. I didn't have Cesareans on 00:05:08.639 --> 00:05:12.486 any of them. My oldest one was the only one I did epidural. The rest of 00:05:12.519 --> 00:05:19.627 them, I just did it all natural, yeah. Mhm. So did you, how did you find 00:05:19.660 --> 00:05:24.265 that inner strength? How did you cope with the pain? Um, during that time 00:05:24.298 --> 00:05:29.627 with all for all my pregnancies, um, well, the first, after my oldest 00:05:29.660 --> 00:05:34.106 daughter, my husband was with me, so he pretty much just calmed me down. 00:05:34.139 --> 00:05:39.387 He did a lot of native music like singing, um, and I just kind of focused 00:05:39.420 --> 00:05:45.387 on what his songs were about and kept me, you know, just. Doing what I had 00:05:45.420 --> 00:05:52.067 to do, you know, and my second oldest when I was um having her in Dallas, 00:05:52.100 --> 00:05:56.467 she actually, she just came right out. It's like I didn't even know she 00:05:56.500 --> 00:06:00.026 was already out and they said congratulations and I was like, what you 00:06:00.059 --> 00:06:05.067 know so that I didn't have but then the other ones I kind they were bigger 00:06:05.100 --> 00:06:10.067 so they weigh more, you know, my oldest was the lightest, the second one 00:06:10.100 --> 00:06:15.145 was kind of bigger. And weight and then the rest of them were pretty much 00:06:15.178 --> 00:06:23.178 8/8 pounds, close to 99 pounds. Yeah. So, um, Did you, so did you know the 00:06:23.858 --> 00:06:28.745 sex of your first child before you gave? No, no, I didn't want to know the 00:06:28.778 --> 00:06:34.575 , the 4th child was the only one that I was, I wanted to know, but the 1st 00:06:34.608 --> 00:06:38.546 3 I never asked I never wanted to know what the sex were, you know, what 00:06:38.579 --> 00:06:43.145 they were, they were gonna be. I wanted a surprise and um, so that's 00:06:43.178 --> 00:06:48.305 pretty much what we had. So we had 2 girls and then the third one was a 00:06:48.338 --> 00:06:53.676 boy. Fourth one was a girl and a boy and then the last one was a girl. So 00:06:53.709 --> 00:06:59.197 with your, um, children, did you um have the naming ceremony with the 00:06:59.230 --> 00:07:03.926 godparents or did you guys name your children? Um, we actually name them 00:07:03.959 --> 00:07:08.226 ourselves, um, except for the godparents, we would leave the middle name 00:07:08.259 --> 00:07:12.796 up to them so that way we know that they were, you know, they're a part of 00:07:12.829 --> 00:07:17.536 them. That that way when they do come to see them and it's a part of their 00:07:17.569 --> 00:07:21.455 lives, they can, they can call them by that name that they've chosen to 00:07:21.488 --> 00:07:26.416 give to them. That's nice. Yeah. So out of all your children's births, 00:07:26.449 --> 00:07:31.015 were they very different or were they kind of similar? Um, I think they 00:07:31.048 --> 00:07:35.846 were all similar. They were pretty much similar, you know, I knew what to 00:07:35.879 --> 00:07:40.046 expect and when I did, it happened that way. So pretty much it was, you 00:07:40.079 --> 00:07:47.325 know. Did, was there anything surprising about the experiences? Um 00:07:47.358 --> 00:07:52.817 Just the first one. Yeah, just the first one. Yeah. No, I think it might 00:07:52.850 --> 00:07:56.156 be. 00:07:56.189 --> 00:08:00.976 That's Donny. It's my youngest. I'll call. That's so nice. We're he could 00:08:01.009 --> 00:08:04.176 tell you we're talking about that. 00:08:04.209 --> 00:08:07.986 So have you been there for any of your children's births? I mean your 00:08:08.019 --> 00:08:13.856 grandchildren, grandchildren? Yes, yes, I, I, on all of them, yeah, all of 00:08:13.889 --> 00:08:18.096 them, and my second, I mean my oldest daughter, when she had her oldest 00:08:18.129 --> 00:08:24.116 daughter, um, I actually kind of saw myself in her, you know, because, um. 00:08:24.149 --> 00:08:30.526 The my granddaughters. Father, the other side of the, you know, the other 00:08:30.559 --> 00:08:37.686 grandmother came and she played the flute. And my daughter was like. She 00:08:37.719 --> 00:08:41.287 was like, get her out of here, you know, she was so annoyed and irritated 00:08:41.320 --> 00:08:45.846 by it because and she was just trying to calm her, but she was like, I 00:08:45.879 --> 00:08:48.645 don't wanna hear nothing. I just wanna deal with this for myself, you know 00:08:48.678 --> 00:08:56.678 , and that was her, her way of getting through um her pain. And, and it 00:08:57.239 --> 00:09:00.116 was, I was like, no, she didn't mean it like that, you know, I'm kind of 00:09:00.149 --> 00:09:05.037 explaining to the other grandma but she said, oh no, I, I went through it 00:09:05.070 --> 00:09:09.557 so I know she said and you know I don't blame her so but you know she 00:09:09.590 --> 00:09:12.596 apologized and said you know I didn't mean to I didn't even know I did 00:09:12.629 --> 00:09:16.557 that but there's times where she didn't know because she was too much in 00:09:16.590 --> 00:09:21.836 pain and that's pretty much where I saw myself in a way and then. I kind 00:09:21.869 --> 00:09:24.336 of comfort her by telling her, you know, it's all right because that's 00:09:24.369 --> 00:09:28.856 what I went through. Yeah. Did you feel that you could provide her more 00:09:28.889 --> 00:09:32.696 preparation because were you more open with your children about the 00:09:32.729 --> 00:09:37.456 process? I'm always, I've always been, and before she went into labor, 00:09:37.489 --> 00:09:41.657 I've explained to her what she's gonna kind of, I said every woman's 00:09:41.690 --> 00:09:45.616 different, you know, I, but I told her how I what I went through when I 00:09:45.649 --> 00:09:51.125 had her because she was the oldest. So she pretty much was, you know, 00:09:51.158 --> 00:09:54.706 trying to keep it brave and said, you know, I can do this and I don't 00:09:54.739 --> 00:09:58.525 wanna go through what you want you went through, but sooner or later she 00:09:58.558 --> 00:10:01.686 found out, OK, yeah, there's no way you can control it if you're in pain, 00:10:01.719 --> 00:10:09.316 you're in pain, you know. So, but my, but. I had all of them natural, but 00:10:09.349 --> 00:10:15.875 then my 3 daughters, 3 older ones, they all have uh children, but they all 00:10:15.908 --> 00:10:21.956 have Cesareans. Yeah, so none of them had natural. So the oldest one has 2 00:10:21.989 --> 00:10:27.116 girls. She has Cesareans, both of them. My second daughter has a boy and a 00:10:27.149 --> 00:10:33.476 girl, Cesarean, then my third daughter has Cesarean because her baby was 00:10:33.509 --> 00:10:40.255 like almost 10 pounds. Yeah, so she, yeah she, she had and she stayed in 00:10:40.288 --> 00:10:46.895 the hospital for a whole week in labor. Yeah, there was, they tried to 00:10:46.928 --> 00:10:51.736 induce her everything she couldn't have it natural, so finally they said, 00:10:51.769 --> 00:10:56.015 you know, the bag already broke. We can't let it, you know, being him in 00:10:56.048 --> 00:11:00.736 there for. You know, appear, you know, they can only have him in there for 00:11:00.769 --> 00:11:05.856 so long. So then they decide it's time for Crean, when you saw that you 00:11:05.889 --> 00:11:10.015 must have thought you had, you had good experiences. Yes, and I was kind 00:11:10.048 --> 00:11:16.476 of like. Hoping that they all would have it the way you know I did, but 00:11:16.509 --> 00:11:21.116 you know I said well we're all built different, you know, so and they even 00:11:21.149 --> 00:11:25.586 talk about that. They always say, why did you have a natural? How did you 00:11:25.619 --> 00:11:29.956 do that? And we all had to go through Cesarean, you know, so we're open to 00:11:29.989 --> 00:11:34.236 talk about the differences, you know, like how they seen it or they 00:11:34.269 --> 00:11:38.635 experience and then. What I tell them, what I went through. Yeah, that's 00:11:38.668 --> 00:11:44.717 great. Do you know in your family who um what generation or who was the 00:11:44.750 --> 00:11:51.667 last person to be born at home? Um, Probably my grandmother. My 00:11:51.700 --> 00:11:56.946 grandmother, my grandparents actually, and that was the old ways then 00:11:56.979 --> 00:12:03.395 cause um. Um, my grandmother used to say her mom and her dad were each 00:12:03.428 --> 00:12:08.846 born, um, in separate homes, but back then when they were born they were 00:12:08.879 --> 00:12:13.885 already put together to be married when they grew up, so that was the 00:12:13.918 --> 00:12:20.486 tradition back then but a lot of it has changed now. So actually like say 00:12:20.519 --> 00:12:26.366 my great grandmother was born, my great grandfather was born, and they 00:12:26.399 --> 00:12:32.246 were born pretty much like almost the same days the parents actually 00:12:32.279 --> 00:12:37.047 talked to each other and said, well, when they grow up, he's gonna marry 00:12:37.080 --> 00:12:42.927 her and she's gonna marry him, so that's how it was back then but my grand 00:12:42.960 --> 00:12:50.125 grandparents um they were both. Um, born at home, yeah, and my mom and dad 00:12:50.158 --> 00:12:54.486 , my dad was born, I think in California because his dad was in the 00:12:54.519 --> 00:13:02.086 railroad, you know, um, traveling, so he was stationed different places 00:13:02.119 --> 00:13:06.846 and my mom, the great grandmother, remember the picture I showed you, she 00:13:06.879 --> 00:13:14.879 actually says that um that um my mom's dad was born in their home. And the 00:13:15.580 --> 00:13:22.346 , the, the, one of the Klan men was the one that um like a medicine man, I 00:13:22.379 --> 00:13:28.186 guess that um helped her deliver and clean the baby up and everything. But 00:13:28.219 --> 00:13:34.486 back then, meanwhile, like now, up to now, when we give birth. We have to 00:13:34.519 --> 00:13:39.645 fast, which means there's 4 days of fasting where we can't just have 00:13:39.678 --> 00:13:46.086 anything with sugar, salt. Everything has to be like natural um foods like 00:13:46.119 --> 00:13:52.336 corn bread, cornmeal, porridge that's made with corn. So everything like 00:13:52.369 --> 00:13:56.807 that, and that's what they say cleanses all the birthing that you, that's 00:13:56.840 --> 00:14:01.765 inside of you as a woman, and they would tie a shawl around you with a 00:14:01.798 --> 00:14:07.316 belt. To help you put pressure so everything can cleanse out. So you have 00:14:07.349 --> 00:14:12.616 to fast for 4 days. Yeah, that makes sense. Um, someone just the other day 00:14:12.649 --> 00:14:17.895 was talking about that, um, binding, you know, to get the uterus to shrink 00:14:17.928 --> 00:14:21.616 back. Yes, that's what we did. They would wrap you and you stand there and 00:14:21.649 --> 00:14:26.576 they would pull that belt real tight. So that's pretty much what we'd 00:14:26.609 --> 00:14:30.856 still do today. That's still our tradition. Did you nurse your children? 00:14:30.889 --> 00:14:38.889 Yes, yes, I did breast fed all of them, yeah, and I, and my. My oldest 00:14:40.190 --> 00:14:45.037 daughter, she breastfed the oldest one. The second one, she can't produce 00:14:45.070 --> 00:14:50.356 , you know, enough, so she actually just had to deal with the, but my 00:14:50.389 --> 00:14:53.765 second daughter, she breastfed both of them, and then the same one, my 00:14:53.798 --> 00:14:59.356 third daughter, she breastfed him. So that's incredible, particularly for 00:14:59.389 --> 00:15:04.436 C-section too because sometimes the milk is harder to, yes, yes. Well, 00:15:04.469 --> 00:15:08.427 Ashley, do you have any questions? 00:15:08.460 --> 00:15:12.096 I don't think so. OK, I don't know if is there anything else you wanted to 00:15:12.129 --> 00:15:16.255 add? I feel bad that we're taking your time, but your story is fascinating. 00:15:16.288 --> 00:15:21.936 I cannot imagine all those children. Yes, yeah, yeah, so, well, next time 00:15:21.969 --> 00:15:27.025 if you guys are around, you can always interview my daughters. We will be. 00:15:27.058 --> 00:15:32.667 Where are they? They're at home and he miss number. Can we visit, um, to 00:15:32.700 --> 00:15:37.226 be here till Tuesday. Are you? Yeah, OK. Well, I'll see the second one is 00:15:37.259 --> 00:15:40.186 able to tomorrow. That would be amazing, yeah, because she lives a real 00:15:40.219 --> 00:15:44.139 rancho. I would love that. OK.