This is Ashley Ziekowski interviewing Tina Wright for the Creative Push
project on July 24, 2015 at about 4:30 p.m. OK. Tina, so first you can
start just telling us a little bit about yourself and your family, like
where you're from, and how many siblings you have and how many kids you
have and stuff like that. OK, um, I'm from um around the Topeka, Kansas.
Area, um, I'm a Kind of the middle youngest girl, the middle. Um, sibling
of 8 children. And I have 5 children of my own.
OK, um, so is there any one of the five births that sticks out as being
much different from the others? Sometimes for women who have multiple
multiple children, it's like the first birth because they really had no
idea what they were expecting, um, or, you know, maybe it's the last one
or or one in between where like you thought you knew what you were
expecting, but it turned out to be something totally different. Yeah, well
, they're all individualized, but probably, uh, my first one is um. The
most That stands out. Just because it's my first and I didn't know what to
expect.
So, so maybe you can take us back to um the time that time um and when
take us back to the time of the pregnancy, and maybe when you first
learned you were pregnant, um you can also tell us a little bit about, I
know a little bit more about it so you can tell us about your age and your
situation a little bit, um, and maybe kind of like the year that it was
like the decade, or you know. OK, well. Um, I actually. didn't realize I
was pregnant until I was probably. 3 or 4 months I was 16 when I got
pregnant. And, um, so I really didn't know a whole lot about. The
different things that you go through when you're pregnant, so, um,
How did you find out? What was the first indication that you were like, I
might be pregnant.
Well, my sister was going through a pregnancy, so I kind of saw her
symptoms and um so I just kind of thought, oh well, I might be pregnant.
So that was kind of my first initial.
Um, noticing or so. When I first found out that I was pregnant back then,
they didn't have any like home tests or anything like that, so you had to
go to the doctor and uh get a blood test done. So that's what I did and
found out I was pregnant. Um, I was staying with my mom and two other
siblings. And then my sister was pregnant also and she was.
17 And So
We just, I just stayed with them. And uh It's my regular.
Just went to like regular doctor's appointments and stuff so. It was a
Kind of uh.
And experience for.
For a young person to not really know what's going on. Um, inside their
bodies and stuff, and back then we didn't have computers to look stuff up
, so it was really. A process of learning from. Another mom. or sister or
your your own mom or aunts, um, so pretty much it's, it was just Um, If
you ever felt like, is this what's supposed to be happening, you just had
to ask someone, so. In this age, it's a lot different. Of course you can.
You know, get mixed up information from the internet and stuff, but at
least you have, you know, somewhere with quick access to kind of try to
figure out what's going on, so. So did you ask, um, So do you, you asked
your mom a lot of questions about during the pregnancy? I mean, did you,
were you able to ask your mom or who did you, who did you talk to the most
when you were finding information out? Probably uh my mom and I had a
midwife with my first. So when I'd go to the doctor's appointments and. I
really didn't have any.
Um, big issues during my pregnancy. Um, it all went pretty smooth and I
was still young enough that I was pretty active, so I didn't gain a bunch
of weight or. Anything like that, so. It was all pretty simple until. The
time when I went into delivery.
That's a whole another story. It's pretty scary. So do you remember, um,
so you were young and it wasn't, you know, huge like physical problem for
you, but do you remember how you felt like you didn't, maybe you didn't
gain a lot of weight, but, um, do you remember like emotionally, did you
have any sort of, where you had, did you have mixed feelings emotionally?
Were you excited about it? Were you scared about it? Um, well, I was
excited that I actually was getting breasts. But um. Cause, uh, that was,
you know, something every young girl, you know, thinks about, so. That was
an exciting part, but along with your breasts growing, uh, your stomach
grows and, and I started seeing like my body changing with like stretch
marks and stuff, so that wasn't too exciting, but. Um, And I really.
I, I really didn't think anything of it too much because I come from a big
family and. I babysat quite a bit. And so. In my mind, I felt like I was
really prepared to have a baby. So, not that I didn't plan it at all, so.
Um,
Anyway,
So What year was it? What year was this? 1980.
So what year were you pregnant?
I was pregnant in 1980.
OK, great. Um, so you, you had a big family and so this was not, even
though I was surprised, you weren't, you weren't as scared as maybe people
would have anticipate a 16 year old girl getting pregnant would be. Yeah,
what I would call it is more naive. Um, So I didn't. I didn't see a whole
lot of people go through. Pregnancies in a negative way, so I didn't see
the pregnancy so much as in, you know, what could happen um there also
wasn't a lot of um births that were. I would say, or I wasn't aware of a
lot of. Um, births that could turn out wrong, um, or something be. Um
Birth defects or any of that kind of stuff. Our family was pretty healthy
babies, so I wasn't scared in that way. And I think being kind of naive
about it. Um, as far as. The pain and. Being in the hospital and exactly
what they had to do. Um,
I think it
I never even thought about it, so.
That's why I didn't.
I wasn't fearful. Or anything. I kind of knew the steps that was gonna
happen, but didn't know the intents of what was about to happen.
So do you remember um your first indication that you were going into labor
? Do you remember where you were? um you can also tell us about um you
know this is going to be listened to by artists, so, um, any sort of like
sensory descriptions like even if it seems like an unnecessary detail like
the color of the walls or like what was the weather out that day or you
know what time of the year it was or where you were exactly if you
remember what you were wearing or what color your shoes were all of the.
What it smelled like anywhere. If you remember any of those, you know,
feel free to include those because that's good for um artists to kind of
get inside of that situation. Um, so you remember your first indication of
labor. Um, yeah, um, I had. I was in at my mom's house and we were
watching, we usually watch the late night. It was kind of a. Not really a
late night show, but I could remember the um Alfred Hitchcock movies. And
that was kind of what we did kind of late at night and um.
When I first started. My labor. It was kind of. Probably around 7 o'clock
in the evening and I had had uh Braxton Hicks earlier, like a couple weeks
earlier, so um each time I would have um Like a pain, I would check to see
how long it was and um how long in between it was uh the time was, so. And
It was started at 7 o'clock and they just kept going and they were
intensified.
And um. Started getting worse and so I just told my mom. Um, I think this
was the time to go and at the time my, the baby's father was getting ready
to go out of town to work, so I was really kind of wanting to make sure
that um. He was close if I in case I went into labor, so um I was on my
mom's couch watching TV and just kind of checking. The times and stuff so.
We probably went in about. 11 o'clock or midnight to the hospital. It was
um.
That was kind of a scary thing. I got put in a room with another lady who
was pregnant who was. Just
Hysterical.
And it kind of scared me cuz I was like. Trying to figure out why she was
like practically climbing the walls and stuff so it, it made me a little
nervous. We just had like a little petition in between us and So that was
kind of scary and then when they came in to examine me and see how far
dilated I was um That was kind of a different experience and. And then
when they, it used to be that they would shave like your pubic area. I
mean the whole thing. So that was kind of an. In experience for me too, so
um.
But they gave me, since I, I don't know if it's because since I was so
young, um, at this time I had turned 17, so I was 17. Um, And they had
gave me like a. Medicine to like relax me, um. So for the, for that part,
I was kind of like dazed in and out and so I would just kind of wake up
and like hear this lady next to me like screaming and so I was like, Kind
of, you know, a little fearful and then I would fade back into sleep. And
then the next thing I, my water never broke, so and they had to go in and
break my water for me and. So I was laying there and.
In and out, uh, back then they kind of gave you medicine to make you kind
of sleepy and. The next time I woke up, I saw the nurse like on top of me
trying to push the baby out and that was that hurt
because I was so out of it that I wasn't awake enough to push when I
needed to, so. They would just tell me push and and I'd be like. Like, I
couldn't do anything, so. Um, They had to use the forceps on.
My oldest, my first. Um, To kinda help pull him out and that was kind of
typical to do too, so. Um, Yeah, and then Uh, once he was out, I. Kind of
woke up and saw him beside me and then they like took him away. So our
Went back to sleep and then when I woke up the next time they were they
put him on me and I started nursing him at that time so but kind of in
between that time I had episiotomy
which.
Then they would cut you first if you're, if you weren't open enough to be
able to birth. So if you tore it would be harder to sew up, to put
stitches. Um, so they did the episiotomy, so, um, it would be heal much
quicker. So Um, And and After that, and then I don't remember the placenta
or anything like that or cutting the cord. So it was kind of. It's sad now
that I think about it. Um, But probably back then. It was probably the
best way or they thought it was the best way to let the. Woman be relaxed.
So
So, um, So was it and so was it it wasn't an epidural, this was something
else. They gave you like meds that just knocked you out. They had a mask
on me, so and. I, I really don't remember if that's what knocked me out,
um. And it could have been they gave me an epidural in my back that I just
didn't. Realize, I think, I think they probably did because I couldn't
feel uh my legs or anything so I'm probably pretty sure they, I think they
called it a a block back then. But um,
I, I wasn't aware that they were giving me anything like that at the time.
So So when you um. When you were able to wake up and realize what was
going on when you were in, were you able to see everything? Like they
didn't, they didn't block you, you know, they didn't put up a sheet or
anything to block you. Like when you woke up, what would you see? I mean,
you woke up and you felt the, you saw the nurse on top of you pushing do
you even, um, at any point when you woke up. Do you remember waking up
during the like delivery part and seeing any of this happening? No, they,
they had like a sheet on my knees, my feet were up that, so I couldn't
really see what was going on. Um,
Down there.
Who was, was there someone else in the room with you that was, that was
watching, or was there someone else in the room that was with you?
Again back in.
Like at that time, it wasn't typical that you had people in the room with
you. It was mainly the, I mean it was the nurses and the doctors, um. My
mom couldn't be there at the time, so she wasn't there. And I don't think
she would let the, they would let her in the room anyway, so. I had my
midwife there. And the nurses.
And I mean, there was people in and out, so. So do you remember? So the
first time you saw your baby was he was next to you. There wasn't. Did you
know you were having a boy? Was there a moment where they told you or were
you out for that or were you expecting that? or you know when was the
first time that you actually got to have a connection with the baby? And
that was the. We didn't have like sonograms to find out what the baby was
, so it was a complete surprise. And it was when he was next to me. I kind
of
That was the only part that I remember then saying it was a boy and he was
sat next to me like on a. I don't know if it's a gurney or the. I can't
think of what they're called. It's like a
A bed that they put him in the nursery or whatever, so they were kind of
cleaning him up then and I could look over and see him. Um, and then once
he got cleaned up is when they, uh, put him on me, on my stomach, so. Do
you remember what you were thinking when you first saw him, like, were you
thinking about what he looked like or were you surprised by anything about
like seeing him for the first time? Yeah, um. I was, I was excited and you
know, I love babies, so. Um,
I was just checking him out and you know, making sure all he had all his
fingers and all his toes and um.
That I I think it was shortly after that I started nursing him and the
nurse was trying to show me how to and stuff like that, so. Um,
One funny story is when the nurse uh came and got him. He was, he was
naked and she put him up to the window to show his dad and he had a bowel
movement in her hand. So that was kind of a funny part of uh when he was
born, so.
And I also remember from them using the forcep, he had kind of like a cone
shaped head. But they put a little cap on it, so, um, and they said that
that was typical and especially using forceps and. Um, so everything would
go would be fine, and I was kind of worried about that. And um the only
other kind of. Story I guess would be that the lady that was screaming and
stuff that was beside me, she was also my roommate uh in the recovery room.
And Um, she had had, I can't remember if it was a boy or a girl, but. Her
baby was born with. 12 fingers. So she had it, he or she had an extra
pinky on each side of her pinky.
And so
They just, I could hear them talking cause I mean there was right there
and just a petition or whatever and I never really, I never saw the baby,
but they were telling the mom how they were going to just tie our rubber
bands around the base of the fingers and they would just like fall off. So
, um.
I never like I said, I never saw the baby and um so, but I thought that
was just kind of. Different It's kind of odd. Yeah, that's pretty. So
after, so they moved you to a recovery room. How long after um the baby
was born, did they move you to the room and what was that room like and
the situation after? Um, I don't remember the exact timing of it. Um, I do
remember. Uh Just having a different room and it was. Like I remember
having one other lady in the room. There could have been more. Um,
The room had a window.
In the front, but um I don't remember any specifics of that. I don't
remember.
Then what food they served or anything like that. So what was the
procedure for after, like, was the baby in the room with you? Or did they
, did they take the baby away and bring him back to you when were the
family with you in the recovery room? Or were you still by yourself? And
then how long did you stay in the hospital? Well. My mom was in the room
when I went into the recovery room. I could see I could have guests come
in, um, for the most part, the baby was in the nursery for the majority of
the time they would just bring the baby and when it need nursed. Um, And
then they would Take him away, so it was a lot, um. And like Today where
the baby stays in the room with you, the majority of the time the baby was
in the nursery and uh.
Forgot what I was gonna say. And how long were you in the hospital? Uh, 3
days. Yeah. Which is also different than today.
And
Kind of one of the different things that I didn't know about was. Um,
When you have a baby boy, they have, they are circumcised, um, and that's
kind of a routine that they do. I don't think they really discussed much
about, you know, One way or the other, which to decide, I think it was
more of kind of just a routine thing to do. So if you didn't really
understand or know about circumcision.
Um To say no, I don't want them circumcised
then. They would just naturally do a circumcision. I'm sure I probably had
to sign something, but I'm, I'm not. I don't remember that and I don't
remember them coming in and telling me the pros and cons of circumcision.
So That was one thing that was kind of. You know, when you change their
diaper, you had to, you had to learn a whole. You like cleansing and stuff
like that, so you had to be careful.
So what was the um like how was home life right after the baby? Like what
, how was your situation and um being now a new mother, what was, what was
that like? And then also dealing, you know, dealing with the baby, but
also dealing with now this body that has just performed this amazing feat
and how is that different? or did you feel different or did you feel the
same as before?
I think I pretty much. I didn't really even think about if I felt
different or anything, I just. It was just
Dealing with the situation, I guess.
OK, so, um, tell us again about your home life, the home life situation
after you left the hospital, you went home with the new baby, um. Kind of
your experience with your first, your first baby and having it at home and
breastfeeding in your living situation, things like that. OK, well, I
remember my mom and my two younger brothers and my sister came to pick me
up from the hospital and uh the first place we went to is we went out to
eat and um it was kind of. Um, Fun to bring the baby in and people were
all like, I wanna see the baby and I was kind of a proud mom and you know
, thought it was. Interesting that, you know, people want to see the baby
and stuff so uh and then I had ice cream, so that was fun. Um and then
when I got home, I probably
My sister had had her baby in July and then.
Uh, my son was born in October, so she already had like a little bassinet
and stuff, so, um.
The baby had a place to stay and stuff, but I was in the.
At home, there was my mom, my stepdad, my two younger brothers, my sister
with a baby in like a 2 bedroom house. So it was kind of, it was pretty
crowded and so. I chose to my choices were to be in the house. Uh, with
the newborn baby with a lot of chaos going on. My stepdad was an alcoholic
and. Um, or we had a, a big conversion van with a bed in the back. So I
chose to. Uh, to stay in the conversion van. We lived in Florida. It was
nice all year round, so the temperature was good and I felt like less
crowded. Um, Staying there, so yeah, for the first probably.
3 to 4 months. I stayed in the back of a van with my newborn baby.
Of course I had my mom, if I had any questions or, you know, I would go in
and out of the house, so it wasn't like I was stranded away, but when. And
my stepdad would be there. I wouldn't be there, so. Um, But my mom helped
a lot with. You know, If I had questions or anything like that, also my
sister, cause she's she had already been through it, so and.
We were kind of in a process of whether we were going to stay in Florida
or if we were gonna move back to Mississippi. So, um,
Anyway, it was kind of like a little transition place but. Um,
The baby was fine, uh. I nursed him, so I didn't have to wake up in the
middle of the night and go get bottles or anything like that and. It was a
little tricky when I had to change diapers cause back then it was cloth
diapers and rubber pants and. So it wasn't quite as easy as disposable
diapers and plus those, those probably would have been a lot more
expensive. At the time I wasn't working, um. So
It was kind of expensive to have a baby, but when you're nursing, you
don't really need anything other than for food wise, uh, anything other
than water or something like that. um, so. That's how his 1st 3 months of
his life were. I don't think he remembers it, so,
but anyway.
So, um, we're also asking people to think about, we're trying to like
categorize all of the stories and everything, so we're trying to think
about if you could kind of sum up that first birthing experience into like
one word or one phrase, like looking back on it, um. What does anything
pop pop up or come to your mind?
Probably at the time of the birds would be.
ScaredGood