This is Boris Solis interviewing Christiane Feibrech on September 11,
2015 for the Creative Push project. All right. So, um, could you start by
just telling us a little bit about yourself? What do you want to know?
Well, I am a French, but I live in Germany for 8 years. This is where I
gave birth to my two daughters, and I live in, uh, I live here in the US
for almost 40 years, and my kids are completely Americanized. Uh That's it.
So, um,
maybe we can talk about both births, try to keep them a little bit
separate, you know, so we'll talk about the first one and then the second
one. can you take us back to the conception of the first one? Was it
planned or? No, the first one was not planned. I was, no, it was not
planned at all. I started to work and I had took a new job in February and
two months later I had to tell them, oh, I have a, I'm pregnant. So that
was not too fun, but I did not advan advan the girl because I had a. It
was not easy for me to conceive according to the doctor. So I just met her
and had and had Natalie, uh, in October. It was a. A vacuum bus because
she couldn't come out. And I was asleep. They may put me asleep because I
had just, I don't know what exactly happened, but anyway, I did not
deliver normally that's all I know. I,
uh, it was a vacuum, you know, like a with a vacuum bus and then when I
was awake, I just saw the doctor at the end and the baby was next to me.
So it was this one that that's all. I don't remember anything. How was, um
, so when you found out you were pregnant, what was your feelings about
the pregnancy? Were you very excited or no, I wasn't.
I was a little annoyed because it was not planned really because I wanted
to work a little longer so, uh, was it an annoyed me it just it would just
, you know, once after that it was just OK. I just was up here to have why
did you why did the doctor think it would be difficult for you to see, uh
, because I was, I don't know exactly, but, uh, I had uh. What these
doctors have to conceive, but to give birth because I was narrow and the
doctor said you may have to take a cesarean. But they did not do it, so
they did the vacuum because it was too late, I think to to do the cesarean
or something because for the second bus, the doctor said to me, just be
careful you may get a cesarean, but he went without, so it was fine. So
you were always petite. I was always petite and you stayed petite while
pregnant. Yes, I did. I did. Nobody uses when I was 77 months pregnant,
people said, Are you pregnant? Yeah. How much? 07 months, really? When I
was what I was like 4 or 5. No, I was always to cheat. Did you know the
sex? No. So at that time we did not know that's, you know, it was not
coming to know the sex. What did you go through like ultrasounds and what
was the, what was your experience preparing for the birth? Oh, I don't
know what I just went to the doctor when, when I'm supposed to go, but I
don't remember. I don't remember like um like ultrasound or something like
this in Europe at that time. I just don't do not remember really. And it
had always been planned that you would go to the hospital when you gave
birth, or did they have midwives or no, no, it was planned to go to the
hospital and that was common. That was common. And we stay a week. Oh. Um
, OK, so. Take us to you also, was it your husband at the time or
boyfriend? Was he planning on being at the he was, but I said no. I didn't
want him to be there. So he did not insist. Do you remember? Did your
water break at home or no, I just, uh, I just went, I just started to have
contraction. It was the middle of the night. And my little suitcase was
ready and I said all foring time to go and then we went and Uh, it just,
it just happened. Well, no, wear something else. I went 10 days. I was
late 10 days for my due date, and the doctor said to me, so in 10 days you
will induce, you will induce the labor. And just the day before it was
supposed to be induced and I got then I started to have uh.
You were lucky, yeah, I was lucky because a lot of times the induction
leads to another intervention. I was lucky. It went, it went good even so
I was a little freaked out when uh the the nurse told me, oh look, your
placenta where it was, it was getting bad. I said everything was fine with
Natalie, so fine. So, um, was it winter time or summer? October it was
October or September. Um, so it was very cold. No, no, no, no, it's like a
fall in in Europe is nice. It's like, yeah, it's nice. So, um, so you
started having contractions at home, you went to the hospital, checked in
, and then how long did that take for you? The bravery itself, um.
I think I was there in the middle of the night.
2 or 3 And if I am not mistaken.
I think she was going around.
3 in the afternoon or something like that. I don't remember exactly. I
just know the second one, but I don't remember. So did you have an IV or
what were the Not that I remember, and you were laying on the bed, yeah.
Can you describe the space, the room or anything? I can't because I don't
remember because like I say, I was asleep to put me to sleep, so I don't
remember. So tell me about that. So you didn't have an IV, but they gave
you, at that time they don't give you IV um.
I think so. I would rightly remember that the nurse said.
OK, you can push whatever. There was something we was pushing I say, I
have to put you to sleep now. I said, OK, fine. So and then uh they put me
to sleep and then when I came back, like I said, the doctor was there and
the baby was next to me. So how did she, did you give you oral medication
through your mouth pill? No, I think she put, she gave me a Nature Wow.
And that's fascinating. Yeah, just so one is much better. So he told you
that he used the vacuum, but you didn't actually see it or.
He told me, yeah, because my paper, I remember being awake, waking up and
the doctor was at the bottom. I take his baby out with the vacuum, so I
don't know exactly what it was, but I was likely aware of it, but it's
just all my paper that a baby was born by vacuum, um, and your husband was
not in the room so when you saw the baby, was there like uh any sign that.
There's pink and yeah, there was pink, that was that, but you know when
she was born, I mean.
we did not have the baby with with us in the room. They were outside and
was always head covered with whatever, so you know, I just, I don tell you
the truth it's so long ago. Did you nurse or? I did not have milk. Yeah,
and that was just, um, you know, naturally you didn't produce, yeah, I did
not produce milk, so I, we tried as the first time it was always such a
problem because I had to do and I didn't have red milk, so we have to put
together
prep formula and It was such an ordeal because that was just, you know, it
was like taking hours to feed her so the doctor said I forget it, just
give her a formula that will be fine. That's what I did. I was just a one
. I didn't 2. I just get directly. So, OK, let's talk about that. So how
much time did you wait between the babies? Oh, they are 3.5 years apart in
the 3 year and something. And the second one was planned then. The second
plan was planned, yeah. So what was that, you know, you just 3 years have
passed and you thought, I really couldn't. Yeah, but we have 2 years and
then we say, well, now we just, you know, we can't have a second baby, so
we just, uh, the attention, you know, so yeah, and then she was born in
December 3 later, 3 quarter later. So why don't you take us back because
you were mentioning before that the doctor had kind of prepared you. Yeah
, when I was pregnant with my second daughter, the doctor said, Well, I
would just let you know you may have to have a Cesarean. I said, OK, fine.
And when I went to, I had like two doctors, I think when I went in in in
December. When I say, OK, I think I have to go now. Then they took me
there when I was, I came at 3 I think and at 5 o'clock or 6 o'clock, the
baby was born, so it was very quick. And I remember I was awake. Uh, I was
, we did not have epidural at that time. I don't not in Europe at least
you didn't have one epidural or you know this epidural, yeah, uh, I had
laugh was what would call laughing guards, so put it there so we had
laughing guards. And I mean I remember that laughing us and when the baby
was born. Uh, the doctor press up my belly, you know, to take off this. I
was like, no, I was, I was yelling and taking his hand because he was
hurting, but I was done. I mean, the, the girl was born in like a couple
of hours. So, and, and very easy even so the doctor said, you know, you
may have problems so I don't know, but my, the girl was baby they were 5
pounds each. OK, so tiny girl or boy, the two girls. So, um, so you, I
started having contractions at home again. During during the night again
and then it was like 3 o'clock. I remember my husband so I was ready with
my suitcase. I remember my husband taking my oldest daughter because she
was 3 in the car with us because we didn't, there was the middle and we
didn't have the babysitter and he left me in the hospital without coming
in because I was uh it was with a girl. And they took me to where I was
supposed to go and give me the baths and whatever they do, and at 6
o'clock I called my husband telling us that we have a girl. OK, let's back
up. They gave you a bath. Do they shave you? Can you say that on record
because that's unusual. They don't do that anymore. Oh yeah, they shave,
yeah, yeah, they give you a bath and then they they shave you and then
they give you a. Laksa or something, so a sedative, no laksa, so you do
you. You don't so the the sheet or something. Yeah, they don't give you an
enema though. No, they gave my mother an enema. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, they
did. So, yeah, where they did give it, yeah, that's who they did. They did
, they did because, yeah, they did because I had a big uh, in my home like
this was was the first girl yeah OK I couldn't sit. Yeah,
can you say that they did um. When my first girl was born, they did that
probably how do you call it enema enema, yeah,
and yeah, they did because when I was awake or what I couldn't sit. I was
wondering why because I had a big a was that called that in my home or
something, you know, like a bruise, yeah, big boos so that's what I know I
had I had one and that for for the second bus to give me one too. I so
they cut what you what you say they cut the that's what they do is they
cut the episiotomy, yeah, they gave you an episiotomy. I don't know what
that is. It's where they cut from your vagina your vagina, yeah, that's
what they did on the first one.
I guess it did on the first one too because this is where I I had this big
uh bruise on my. Oh my, did you have stitches? Uh yeah. Mhm. Can you say
they gave me an or an episiotomy? Is they gave me what an episiotomy,
episionobi, is that what you said?isiotomy pinoy. I can't do that.
I think he did fine. Um, OK, so that's very interesting, because those are
practices they don't do anymore, which is one of these interesting things
of doing this project, particularly in Germany, hearing the stuff about
sedatives and laughing gas. It's fascinating. So with the second birth,
you went in, they prepared you. And then they put you on the bed, yes, and
they gave you, they gave me the mask, yeah, they gave me a and you were
still having contractions. I was still having contraction and every time a
comes it's a breeze in then they put the mask it's out the mask every time
, you know, you feel like it was hurting and that was it. And did you find
the laughing gas help with the, yeah, yeah. So, um, so then it was time to
push. Yeah, it was time to push, and then I pushed, and then I mean he
went very like I said, very, very fast.
The first one, no, but the second one he was actually and your husband was
not in the room.
So was it the same doctor? Yeah.
Yeah, there was the same doc well there was the same hospital I was under
the same doctor. Um, care. But it's the first time there was a professor
itself would would deliver me and the second time there was one of this
guy or whatever. So did you speak German? Do you speak yeah and French?
Yeah. Any other languages? No, the English if I say so, um, OK, so then,
um, you give birth and what was that rush? Did they say it's a girl or?
Yeah, as I say, it's a girl, and then I know we did not have a name for
her for the girl yet, so I just called my husband. I said, what that's her
name? I did. I just even you didn't even tell him to choose and just call
him and say, OK, we have an idea. Why were you calling him to tell you,
but he was at home. Because he was at home with the first girl with the
first daughter. That's right, because you didn't have a baby a babysitter.
That was the middle of it was 6 o'clock or whatever when I was 5 o'clock
when the girl was born, so I called him to tell him we have a girl. So
what name did he come up with? I did with the name because I like the
names. What was the name? Nadine, Nadine, nice. Wow, that's interesting.
So then you stayed there for a week. Did he come the next day and visit,
uh, yeah, he come next way. uh, OK, I have to say it was the first, I was
in the same clinic for both time. the first time for my first girl he came
every day. The second time he could not come he came, but my daughter was
not allowed to come with me. Uh, she was not allowed to go in the room
with the baby, so we had to go out of the my room out of the little clinic
and go in the hallway to to meet her. The children had a certain age were
not allowed in a in a. In the clinic when I was there. So did you have a
long recovery? I mean, were you in pain? No. No.
No, I had, uh, no, I was fine. I just, I had like a gym before, you know,
like a prenatal, and then when I came back I did gymnastics too, and I in
a couple of two months I was in shape to the gymnastics, yeah. Don't you
do that here? No. Yes, you do, what you call um. Lama OK, let's back up.
This is like what you do with Lamar. It's not like so you're talking about
gymnastic type aerobics that are specific for no, no aerobic, like stuff
that are specific to bis. You know a birthing class. Yeah, I guess it's
the same as you do now I'm sick. Yeah, so can you talk to us a little bit
about what that birthing class was? Well, there was once a week and then
we were there and we did. Exercising, breathing and I remember lying down
when you know. 11 hand here and one hand here, yeah, something like that.
It was, it was to prepare us, I guess, for, for, for the birth and were
the husbands integrated? No, they were just women. I never I never saw
guys. Did you guys because a lot of times in America, it was normal to
have a support network, where your mother would be there with you. Did you
have family? No. Were they not in the area? Well, I don't have parents. I
am no fan and my in-law lived in I was a, I, I don't know, it was not in
Germany. It was not like.
You just, you were prean well, fine, you did what you have to do and then
but you know it was not a big deal.
It was not a big deal. You do if you, if you wanted, you could go to this
gymnastic or some I call them, uh. But you don't have to. It was up to you
, you know, so and there's the same thing after the birth, you could also
take this kind of gymnastic lesson to, you know, to get to get fit and
what I did both times, so I, I, I came back to my shape pretty quickly. Um
, I'm reading about labor and delivery in France, and they said that, I
know you have a mean to go to. They said that after women give birth,
they're very much aware of women's pelvic floor and doing exercises for
your Our internal organs in a way that we don't in America. A lot of times
women have incontinence after giving birth and in Europe, they just don't
because they really do a lot of these and they'll actually put a ball
inside a vagina and actually do some interns. I never heard about that. I
was curious. OK.
OK, so then you brought the baby home and everything was fine. Yeah, yeah
, it was how were the two little girls with the 3 year old with the
newborn.
I think that was kind of a jealousy, you know, like here, like a revalry
with the kids and then but it was fine but they were each in a room, so I
was paying attention. Yeah, it was fine. It was fine. Yeah. So I'll let
you go because I know you have to go, but I want to ask you one more thing.
Um, we've been asking people to kind of come up with um like reflect on
their experience to come up with a word or phrasing of words that um
portrays their experience or somehow encapsulates their experience and
some people have said, um you know some people have said. I don't know.
There's some good ones transformative or it's like
the birth experience, it was almost like their child was giving birth to
them and they'd be changed so much as a person. Can you reflect on your
whole experience at all? You know, I, I just thought that was so easy, uh
, really, both, both times, even so for the first one I have ugly, uh, I
don't remember everything at all because I was obviously, but for the
second one that was easy and it was hurting, but you forget about that so
quickly once you have, you know, it was, it's we did not have all this, uh
, injection or whatever that you do here like my daughter did. Now they
have the epidural you call them or whatever, but. I mean, yeah, sure, it
hurts at the beginning, but you forget because the baby's here and then
it's cute and then no, I mean. I I, I, I, no, it was. It was nothing. It
was special because I have two beautiful babies, but uh. Um, there was not.
Oh no, I don't see anything else I can tell you. Yeah. No, that was good.
Thank you so much for doing this. I really.
Yeah, I still I don't remember, you know, so I know, I, I know, but, but
some of that is really fascinating for us because we haven't heard that
perspective. You did not. Oh, it was a good things compared to here, so we
stay one week in the hospital, yeah, so we were like really good, yeah,
when we came back, you know, that was nice. Yeah, I stay a while too, and
um and I remember that you did you have the Caesarean too? No, I was lucky.
I thought I was going to have a C-section, but I didn't. It was vaginal.
I was very lucky because the recovery is harder with that, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, I was I was lucky too that I didn't have one because it
was good. It was like this funny thing the doctor was saying, oh, be. Be
careful. You may get one and then I went there it was like poof, you know
, second time I compared to the first one. I was like, OK, well, if, if
that happens the same thing, but now it was fine. So it was good, good. OK
, thank you.