VOLUME XX NUMBER 1 JANUARY 1994 The Women's Center Newsletter staff, in ongoing efforts to provide a quality forum for the valley's lesbian community, is in the process of restructuring and streamlining operations. We are greatly in need of more women who can devote a few hours each month to help produce the valley's largest lesbian-oriented paper (and who don't mind having a bit of fun in the process). We are also looking for women who are interested in serving on our board of directors and we have a number of positions vacant. Initially this would entail monthly meeting, but we hope to be able to reduce board meetings to a few each year. The WCN is a non-profit 501-c organization, and we particularly need people who have some experience with the administrative insand-outs of 501-c groups. We also need creative thinkers with ideas for increasing circulation, attracting advertisers, expanding newsletter content, etc. If you’ve ever thought about getting involved with the WCN organization, now is a great time and opportunity and we strongly urge any interested women to attend our general meeting on Thursday, January 13th at 7:00 pm at the Valley of the Sun Lesbian and Gay Center located in Phoenix, at 3136 N. 3rd Ave. (west of Park Central Mall on the comer of 3rd Ave. and Flower) For more information, call our volunteer coordinator (Kathy) at 833-2293 or 921-1521. » !■ !----- !■*—= i« i-------= u = Q a n r iE](g^= n — !■ i------ ™i- = = imi----------- 1 MLK March invitee lesbians & gays For the first time in history , organizers of the Phoenix Martin Luther King March have invited lesbian and gay citizens to join in their march. The Arizona Human Rights Fund (AHRF) is putting out a call for lesbians and gays to celebrate Martin Luther King's birthday and this invitation. For those individuals wishing to carpool to the march, you are invited to meet AHRF organizers at the Valley of the Sun Gay and Lesbian Community Center, 3136 N. 3rd Ave, Phoenix (3rd Ave/North of Thomas at Flower). People will gather at The Center at 7:30am, Monday, January 17th. You can also choose to gather at the site of the march at 8:00am at 16th Street & Jefferson. The MLK March begins at 9:00am and will proceed to Wesley Bolin Plaza, where marchers will find speeches, booths and a festival. If you have questions about this event, please contact AHRF at 530-1660. 3!^ a í l B ( i r EI! A REAL "BRICK" The next time you're at the Phoenix Zoo, you might want to glance down as you approach the zoo entrance. As part of a fundraising drive to raise money for a new exhibit of Asian spectacled bears, the zoo is selling paving bricks on the entrance bridge. Each brick is imprinted with the names or phrases of the donor’s choice, and any number of bricks can be purchased. A few months ago the Breakfast Club members pitched in and purchased one red brick which can be seen in row 157 on the north side of the entrance bridge. Printed on the brick is simply LESBIAN BREAKFAST CLUB. J c CLUB BREAKFAST HAS E W DIRECTOR Starting in January, the Breakfast Club will have a new coordinator and a new information phone number. Velo has generously volunteered to take over scheduling for the group and to provide a new information phone line. Except for the new number, things will operate pretty much the same, with advance schedules provided and the weekly location available by calling the number on Saturday or Sunday morning. I have enjoyed scheduling the Breakfast Club for the past three years, but am looking forward to a bit o f a break and am very grateful to Velo for offering to take over. I would also like to use this opportunity to thank Velo for her many hours o f service to the Women's community in a variety o f activities-she is certainly one o f our community's unsung heroes. For those unfamiliar with the Breakfast Club, we are a group o f women who get together on Sunday mornings to enjoy a meal, laughter, good fun and conversation, and the chance to meet new people. There is no sign-up, no dues, no required attendance, or forms to fill out. It is simply a weekly opportunity to spend some quality time in the company o f some quality folks. For more information and the location o f the next Breakfast Club, call Velo at 955-0317. Happy New Year to all!! -Kathy PAGE 2 FLUSH RUSH (lindbaugh) JOIN THE FLUSH RUSH CAM-PAIN! byB . Swan Last week, to my great despair I spent three whole nights with the remote in my hand doing the exact opposite o f what I usually do with it. I muted the program and un-muted the commercials! On Channel 12 during the Rush Lindbaugh Show the following commercials ran... Energizer Batteries (Bunny) Long John Silver Acutrim Obsession 2000 Flushes (Ha) Casual Comers Sanderson Ford Touchtone Pictures Levitz National Review (Bah) K F Y I910 am (mns his radio K-Lite 104.7 show too) Lens Express Service ABC Nissan Henry Brown Chevrolet Federal Express Circuit City (RCA, Hotpoint) Lady Remington Mint Snuff GOP Baseball Cap (figures...) How about a Flush R ush list every month? You Know...a "these are the commercials that ran during the Rush L. show on Cannel 12 this month list." Or we could even let these business' know we will not spend our money with them? And, if we all watched once in awhile (the way I did) maybe we could form a "watch Rush' Commercials Tree", so no one gets sick! Also, we could let Channel 12 know what we think o f their choice to air his show. After all, most sensible people know he is the greatest CONMAN to come along since the Snake oil salesmen o f the Old West days. He deliberately feeds off the lowest common "denominator" o f our Freedom o f Speech with no • respect for the reasons our foremothers and fathers valued it. His motives are no different than the Porn Industry ... $$$$$. He has no empathy for anyone he attacks. . .and he's laughing (at) with all the stupid people who BUY his books, watch and listen to his shown...ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK! Let's face it...he was the happiest person in the country when Bill Clinton was elected. His Conservative "sky is falling clap-trap" is a front for making millions off" the ignorant. * The sky is not falling Mr. Lindbaugh but, you may hear the distant sound o f many flushes real soon! P.S. If anyone knows where we can have small "FLUSH RUSH" stickers made we can stick them everywhere we go. What fun! 1= ANOTHER BRICK IN THE WALL The Berlitz Gallery Theatre on Camelback Road announced its new “Buy a Brick” program in the memory of those who have died from complications due to AIDS. Patrons may purchase a glass brick, which will be engraved with the name of a friend or loved one, for $50. Each brick will become a part o f a permanent memorial wall to be installed at Berlitz in the Spring o f ‘94. For more information, call Berlitz at 263-0587. ■I M O T H E R The deadline for submissions of ANY SORT, including ads, to the Women's Center Newsletter has been and will continue to be the 15th of the somth preceding the issue of publication. Please adhere to this schedule. In the future, the deadline will be strictly enforced. The volunteers who put out the Newsletter have tried to be as flexible as possible regarding last minute submissions, however, the situation has become unmanageable. Newsletter volunteers put in many long hours each month to produce the newsletter, and last minute submissions create havoc with already strained schedules. All items have to be entered on the computer, printed and proofed before layout can occur. Late submissions delay this process and unnecessarily stress the volunteers. Please be considerate and mail your submissions early, especially calendar events. REMEMBER: If we don’t receive it by the 15th - it will NOT be printed for another month. Plan accordingly and mail early. Business Sponsors Suggested Donations Bulletin Board notices, per word with $3 . min. Business Cards: 1/8 pg 5x4" 1/4 pg 5x8" 1/2 pg 10 x 8" Full 10 x 16" Please make checks to: Women's Center, Inc. $ .15 8.00 20.00 35.00 65.00 125.00 Women's Center, Inc. January 1994 This month's helpers: Sheryl, Diane, Kate, Lue, Jean Ellen, Cindi, Kamela, Velo, Karen, Barb Kathy Please limit Letters to the Editor to 200 words, feature articles (front page) to 1000 words or less, general articles of interest to 500 words or less. Letters and articles do not necessarily reflect the opinions or philosophy of the Women9s Center, Inc. Copyright belongs to each individual author. ALL submissions must include name, address, phone and signature of author for verification purposes. Please indicate how you would like your name printed, or let us know to withhold your name. We will edit for clarity only, after consultation with the author. Some spelling may be edited if it affects the clarity of the work. Contributions must be received by the 15th of each month for consideration in the next month* s issue. Women*s Center, Inc. P.O. Box 26031 Tempe, Arizona 85285 602-266-5542 (voice) 266-5797(TDD) LLEGO GRANT LLEGO, the national organization of Gay and Lesbian Latinos, has received a $420,000 grant from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) to fund a project targeting the Latino Gay and Lesbian Community. LLEGO is the first gay Latino group to be funded by the CDC and will use the grant for a program titled “Training Assistance and Training on AIDS Projects” (TATA). Lettia Gomez, co-chair of ENLACE, Washington DC’s local Latino gay organization, has been named executive director of the project, which will offer technical assistance to more than 75 Gay and Lesbian Latino groups around the country. a N E V E R T O L D ... - LO V IN G A W OM AN CAN BE DANGEROUS -H ETERO SEX UA LS HAVE NO M O N O PO LY ON V IO LEN CE -TH ER E IS A SAFE PLA CE TO FIND H E L P Thank you very much! SO JO U R N E R C E N T E R 258-5345 B A T T E R E D L E S B IA N ’S G R O U P For Lesbians coping w ith abusive relationships past o r present A sk for M arilynn Individual counseling by appointm ent Sliding fee scale ...« 1 V B K M O TH ER N E V E R KNEW ? The LRP would like to express our sincere thanks to Jayne and Victoria of Bas Bleu Productions for their generous donation of $500 to the LRP. Thanks also for bringing Suzanne Westenhoefer to the Valley for a great performance. W e’re certain the community waits for many more such events. PAGE 3 MORE ORGANIZATIONS DOMESTIC PARTNER OFFERING BENEFITS W E B ELO N G T O G E T H E R - AGAIN! On November 6, a wonderful group o f women met at my house to talk about community. We talked about experiences we'd had that felt like community, and we talked about the elements that need to be present for us to feel a sense o f community: 1 2. j 4. 5 6. 7. 8. A feeling o f belonging. A feeling that you matter to other people in the group, and that they care whether or not you are present. A sense o f history together - that people in the group share memories and experiences. Being greeted by other members o f the group when you arrive. Intimacy - here's an item with many definitions! We could spend a whole day talking about this one! A feeling o f safety - here's another "essential" which will differ for many women. A feeling that you are accepted and understood. Commitment - Whew! This is a biggie! I would like to spend a few sentences talking about these last two elements. In many Native American traditions, there is a spiritual focus on respect for all people. Not only is it essential to respect the earth, the animals, the spirits; it is essential to respect other people. This is not to ensure a place in heaven, but for one's own spiritual health. The more respect and acceptance we can have for other people, the better able we are to respect and accept ourselves and our own foibles. This works both ways: the more acceptance we have for ourselves—the healthier our self-esteem-the easier it is to accept others for the humans they are. This doesn't mean that you have to love every person you meet, or even like them, but it does mean that we make an effort to respect the person they are and the path they are on, even when they seem really "weird"! I believe that we are bom with the inclination to accept people for what they are, but we are then educated in many ways, from youngest childhood, to make judgments and distinctions between people. We learn to discriminate and we learn not to trust. We learn "us and them", and we practice it unconsciously most o f the time. I don't think that a relatively small and suppressed group (like lesbians) can afford to make as many distinctions as we tend to do. I think that we must make every effort to be as accepting o f each other as we can, and I think that we must practice this effort every chance we get. We probably won't be able to do this perfectly, but we can try. The second item I'd like to discuss is commitment. In order to have community, you must be committed to it. You must commit some part o f your energy, your thoughts, and your presence to your community. Sometimes the most important thing you can do for your community is just to show up. Show up, and if there are women there you have never met, go right up and introduce yourself. Yes, that is a hard thing to do. But just think how good you have felt when people have reached out to you, when you have been a 'stranger in a strange land". In every gathering, there are people who are more frightened and shy than you are. Be good to them, be kind: put out your hand and share your name and a smile. If someone acts like you have leprosy, move on—I guarantee you'll have more fun than being trapped in an elevator with k.d. lang! (Well, almost as much fun!). Just picture it: a whole room o f lesbians going around introducing themselves to each other. The noise! The laughter! The energy! Whew! Just do it! We are going to be talking more about these elements o f community at the next community pot luck (great food in November!), scheduled for Sunday, January 16, from 4 to 7 pm. Please call Lee Lawton, 990-2194, to R.S.V.P. Location will depend on how many women want to participate. FEMINISM The following employers have recently joined the ranks of those who extend insurance benefits to the partners of gay and lesbian employees: Blue Cross and Blue Shield of Massachusetts Federal National Mortgage Association Group Health Cooperative of Seattle New York University San Francisco State University These progressive businesses join an ever-growing group which offer domestic partnership benefits, including Microsoft, Apple, the city of Seattle,, Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research, and Columbia University. High tech companies and universities are leading the way for municipalities, law firms, health care organizations and smaller private companies to establish policies of inclusion. paint, saw, hammer, sweep, vacuum, hang, drill, file, organize, eat, talk, laugh... Do these activities sound interesting to you? You can find them all in one place! Sunday, January 9th 10:00am -12:00 pm The LRP is hosting a "spiff-it-up-finish-it-off" party at the LRP. We have a list of tasks that need to be completed before our space is considered finished. W e hope that many hands will come to help get the LRP ready for our annual meeting (see notice this issue). Please call the LRP at (602) 266-5542 or 266-5795 (TDD) if you’d like more information. We look forward to seeing you there! booksbooks books books books books booksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbksbooks booksbooks books books books books books booksbooks books books books books books books booksbooksbooks booksbooks books booksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooks booksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooksbooks booksbooks booksbooks L R P ’s Library Task Force seeks new members T he Library Task Force (L T F) is looking for w om en who are interested in working with donated m aterials and m aking them accessible to o u r community. The L T F usually m eets once a m onth and asks you to m ake a 35 h o u r com m ittm ent during th at time. If you’re interesed please call K aren at 966-4521 or you can reach h er at the LRP, 266-5542 o r 266-5797 (T D D ) W A N T E D : M A N U S C R IP T S THE FEMME MYSTIQUE, a lesbian anthology edited by Leslea Newman, to be published by Alyson Publications, seeks writing that explores all aspects of being femme. Essays, stories, poems and black-and-white photos sought from femmes, former femmes, femme wanna-bes, and admirers of femmes. Send SASE for guidelines. Deadline January 30,1994. Leslea Newman, Box 815, Northampton, ME 01061 PAGE 4 BOOK REVIEW by Patricia Victour © For Darcie Beamlight by Dianne Whitmire Do not fear, for I shall not hurt you. Do not leave me, for I shall not desert you. Just give me time, for 1 need time to heal and grow grow upward toward the sunshine...... your sunshine.......... golden beam of light coming into my life, thru the windows of my soul. Stre a k s by Robin W. You know how you meet someone who gives you a whole lot of something you wish you had more o f they put some color in your rainbow You reach out to take hold o f their hand trying to make something between you maybe if you squeeze your hand tight enough in hers you'll make a diamond but as you're dreaming o f this diamond and how shiny it'll be you loose your balance and fall on your face because she walked away you know how your life is putzing along and you wish you had something more You're sitting there and out of nowhere someone STREAKS by and STREAKS your boring but clean gray tee-shirt with brilliant red paint it takes you totally by surprise you decide you look better in red than gray here I am STREAKED more than once by a rainbow o f woman I'm left off balance flat on my face still smelling o f sticky oil paint not that I mind much. Become a volunteer for your newsletter Call today - 266-5542 PATIENCE & SARAH, by Isabel Miller Patience & Sarah is one o f those rare books written in such a way that I am compelled to read certain lines and passages several time, savoring the beautiful way the words have been lovingly joined together, like the pieces o f glass forming a mosaic, or the notes o f a haunting melody. Yet, the compelling prose does not overwhelm the delicate framework o f a simple story. I especially liked that it was told from the viewpoints o f two totally different women, in their own very distinct voices. The book is based on the lives o f Mary Ann Wilson and her companion, Miss Brundidge, who lived and farmed together in Greene County, New York State, in the early 1800s. The two women, kindred spirits from vastly different backgrounds, meet and discover they are in love and wish to make a life together - despite all the obvious difficulties (then as now) o f such a relationship. Patience (probably based on Miss Brundidge) is, for her day, an educated woman and an artist o f some talent. Having been left a secure if modest pension by her father, she has a modicum o f autonomy. Sarah, on the other hand, is a shy and sensitive farm girl. Because all o f their children are girls, she has been brought us as "the boy" by her family, helping her father with the heavy farm work a son would otherwise do. O f course, neither family is pleased when they find out what Patience and Sarah are up to and, reminiscent o f Heathcliff, Sarah leaves for the frontier sans the love o f her life. Posing as a young man (a popular theme in lesbian/feminist literature, it seems), Sarah has many interesting adventures until she can no longer stand being away from Patience, no matter the consequences, and takes advantage o f an opportunity to go home again. Inevitably, Patience and Sarah take up where they left off and are soon discovered in bed by Patience's sisterin-law, Martha, who, naturally, tattles to her husband, Edward. Actually, it is hinted that Martha is jealous o f Patience and Sarah; unfortunately, that interesting avenue is not explored at any length, and readers are left to their own speculations. Spurred by his wife, Edward agrees that in order to forestall any further scandal, Patience must leave with Sarah - the exact "punishment" Patience was hoping for. Being basically a fair man (who at one point asks Patience what she and Sarah "do" - honestly, don't straight people have any imagination?), he agrees Patience may retain her inheritance, which she plans to use to buy a farm in the "wilderness" o f New York State for herself and Sarah. This accomplished, by the end o f the book we can rest assured that here, indeed, is a story where the lovers live happily everafter. Patience & Sarah was published in 1969 under the title A Place For Us. It is now available from Fawcett Crest in paperback for $4.99, or check with the LRP Library to see if they have a lending copy on the shelf. Margaret Atw ood a Must-Read Margaret Atwood has written another book. I read a lot o f book reviews, but when I see Margaret Atwood as the author, I just write the title down on my "Must Read" list, and don't even bother to read the review. Margaret Atwood, in my not so humble opinion, has never written a bad book; not even a mediocre book. If The Handmaid's Tale", "Cat's Eye", or "Lady Oracle" ring a bell with you, you'll probably want to join Fourth Friday on January' 28. We'll be discussing the books o f Margaret Atwood, that Canadian guru o f feminist dystopias. We may also discuss her newest book. The Robber Bride, where again the real characters are women, the marginal characters men. The NewYork Times says that The Robb Margaret Atwood's "funniest and most companionable book in years". Cuddle up in front o f the fireplace, or just light a candle, and read something by Margaret Atwood. Bring your thoughts to Fourth Friday. We'll be waiting for you! On Friday, February 25, we will be discussing the books and poetry o f Adrienne Rich. Please bring a favorite poem to share. More about this Fourth Friday will appear in the February newsletter. To facilitate discussion, group size will be limited, so please make a reservation by calling Lee Lawton, 990-2194. We meet from 7:00 -10:00 pm. Bring paper and pencil, your notes if any, a folding chair, and your sense o f humor! The Sound Of Music by Robin A. Dee The LRP s 2nd ANNUAL WINTER CONCERT was held on December 11th, 1993 (or 9993 depending on what calendar you use) at the 1st Unitarian Church in Paradise Valley. When I walked through the door the first person I spoke with was Carol Anne who was selling tickets. "Hi, so nice to see you! Give me ten dollars," she said. Ten bucks! Man, that's a lot o f money around Christmas. I gave it to her, felling the bite in my wallet, and picked up a program. The program was impressive in itself, one o f the best I've seen. It is concise, graphically and font attractive and the lay out was first rate. Each act had a lengthy and interesting bio followed by "Volunteer Opportunities at the LRP". I've had so many people tell me that they had tried to volunteer for something, (anything!) at the LRP and their calls were never returned. I think the Movers-and-Shakers have cured this communication problem and those o f you who still have an interest in community service should try again. Very smart to put this in the program. The advertisers, it said in the back, made this program as successful as it was, so if you get a chance, call a couple o f these business', (you don't have to buy anything!) and tell them you saw their name m the LRP Winter Concert program. Then, if it's no skin off your nose, call them when you need services such as these. There was an informational insert about Barb Jones running for the Tempe City Council. Can you believe it!? One o f US IN ARIZONA, RUNNING FOR A CITY COUNCIL SEAT! I've been waiting all my life for us to have the opportunity to show the world what we can do, that we are as intelligent as men and 'straights' and have equal integrity and concern for our fellow humans. Barb Jones, by virtue o f her relationship to our Lesbian family, will represent us all in front o f mainstream America. That's heavy, but doggone it, we deserve people like her. The MC was the Reverend Charlotte Strayhom, a high energy kind o f gal. She was a super MC, walking into to audience at every opportunity and speaking directly to individuals. Slique Callahan's set was, as usual, side splitting. Sometimes I can't understand what she's saying but the expression on her face cracks me up anyway. Her face is a Jonathan Winters/Robin Williams kind, one that melts and shifts into exaggerated expressions deftly showing her versatility. The community loves her and can't wait to see Dykotomy, "a lesbian drama o f love, obsession, rejection, and ultimate acceptance," which is an opera she wrote based upon the famous opera Carmen. Kaweah was excellent, a voice that sounds like Native American flute playing, melodious and spiritual. I hope to see more o f her at future events. Fatimah Hallim! What a performer! I hadn't read her bio in the program before her act, (Okay, I didn't bring my glasses!) so I wasn't prepared for this burst o f enthusiasm, this bigger-than-life story teller. I loved running through Harlem getting into trouble, watching the old hag spoon molasses into her mouth, having nightmares and ultimately killing her. I loved telling that lyin' monkey to get into the tree. .. I lover the feeling o f 'play' her performance gave me, the enduring childhood kind o f entertainment I don't normally experience. After reading her bio this morning I only have one thing to say.... Fatimah, will you marry me? TLC performed at the LRP Auction in October and were very well received. This night was no exception. I very much liked their way o f entering their act. They walk slowly from the back o f the room to the stage, one person singing with the others gradually joining in until they are all in order on stage and they are all singing. Their distinct yet blending voices creates a whirlpool o f wonderful notes. I like this group. Charlotte M. Strayhom's, "RC to her friends", act was filled with electricity. Her choice o f Bette Midler material spoke volumes about her connection with the women of the audience. I am absolutely intoxicated with her trademark opening song about the mountain, and we're not going to give it up, and we didn't come all this way to let them get it, something, something, love, something, something. I feel a spiritual tug when she slaps her leg in emphasis. What a show she put on! What talent! Thank you, RC. Jess Hawk Oakenstar and Nancy Goodson closed the evening with several fine songs. Jess Hawk Oakenstar's bio says she was bom and raised in Zimbabwe and later liver in New Zealand. Wow! And just think, she ended up in Phoenix performing for me! Don't you think there's something to the current New Age philosophy of Divine Order? continued on next column PAGE 5 it has become typical for all our events to be signed and Holly Wilson was there, as she is at so many functions, translating. m „ ^ r u Sid^ t0 the eVening is the Lesbian Breakfast Clubs new motto, What Do We Have To Do? Hit You With A Brick“7" which refers to a brick inscribed with "Lesbian Breakfast Club" that Kathv Hopkins purchased at the Phoenix Zoo and which is now residing in one o f it s walkways. (Actually, their motto hasn't changed, it's still Come to breakfast if you want".) r ^ l h%3 u °Ul 6VeninS paSSed t0° swift'y and as 1 was walking out I though o f the $10 admission price and had to laugh bov did I cheat them! ...... ■ SISTERS HONORING SISTERS Last year over 100 women gathered for the first Sisters Honoring Sisters ceremony at the Universalist Unitarian Church on Lincoln Drive. M ost had never attended a goddess event, but everyone there seemed to rejoice in the celebration o f women by women. The energy was outstanding, the performances were exhilarating, the food was superb!! It was a never-to-be forgotten event. This year the Sisters Honoring Sisters celebration will be held Sunday, January 2, from 4 to 7 pm. We invite any women to attend; bring only drums and rattles, and finger food to share. This event is sponsored by the Goddess Women Network for the women o f the valley. We want you there, but you must call to reserve a place because o f limited space. For information and reservation, call Sharon at 274-0230 or Norma at 266-4111. You are cordially invited to a . . . COMMUNITY FORUM & LRP ANNUAL MEETING Sunday, January 30th ll:00am-l:00pm You will have the opportunity to m eet the LR P Advisory and Project Councils, ask questions about LR P program s and policies and talk about issues th at effect our lesbian com m unities. You will also receive L R P ’s 1993 A nnual R eport. The Advisory Council will be providing a light brunch for the event. W e hope you will m ake this d ate a priority on your 1994 schedule. Please call the L R P at (602) 266-5542 or 266-5797 (T D D ) if you have any questions. Rally Against Rape The Rally Against Rape is scheduled for Saturday, January 22, 1994 at Wesley Bolin Plaza in the State Capitol. Invitations for participation have been sent nationwide. Recipients include President and Hillaiy Clinton, U.S. Attorney General Janet Reno, Mrs. Barbara Bush, as well as national entertainers including Garth Brooks, Vince Gill, Gloria Estefan and Oprah. Local politicians, celebrities, law enforcement agencies and victim support organizations are also invited to attend. The rally will feature musical performances, speeches, and organizations hosting information booths. A rally program filled with valuable information will be distributed throughout the event. Following the rally's main stage events, a more intimate, personal sharing area will be provided for those who wish to make a public statement about their own experiences with rape. A platform (giving each person 5 minutes) will be open in a designated area following the general rally. This area will be intimate in design and allow people to speak and share freely. Currently, Rally Against Rape" is inviting rape survivors as well as family and friends of victims to submit their personal stories to be included in a published book to be released in conjunction with the Rally. Stories may be told or expressed through a variety of media including writing, poetry and art. Rally proceeds will benefit Advisory Board selected rape prevention programs. For more information concerning Rally Against Rape, call Martin Carlson Events at (602) 990-1979. T re e - style The summer after Sonia Johnson's book, The Ship that Sailed into the Living Room came out, I was traveling. Everywhere I went, women were questioning their relationships with lovers and partners. Sonia's central metaphor is the large clumsy ocean liner, parked in the middle of all our living rooms - the "relationship." She says that we spend all our time polishing the ship, and ignore our true needs and desires. I visited friends in Kentucky, and found that they'd all jumped off the Relationship. A year later, I got an anguished letter from one of them. She was floundering the open sea, unable to make any kind of contact with the woman she loved. In trying to answer her letter, I found myself asking the question: how can we be together, and still be free? We look across a great distance a each other, trying to think of new words to describe the energy we feel. The energy is real and strong between us. It has color, shape, movement. We study it, noticing how responsive it is. We try to catch it in our hands, but it flows back into the air. We cannot hold it. We watch it and enjoy its richness, its brilliant patterns in the air. We begin to willfully change the energy, tossing our feelings out to a particular person. It feels like painting the air. We are all adept at catching the feelings that are tossed our way. We've grown up taking the feelings from all around us, making these feelings part of our own bodies. We are attracted by this skill in each other: it's one reason we’ve chosen to love women. When one woman sends out a feeling, the other woman hears it, sees it, or knows it in her own way. She doesn't judge, and she doesn't confuse it with a request. If someone knows your feeling, and still feels centered in herself, then you feel safe with her. If she denies or criticizes your feeling, or says, "Well, what do you want ME to do about THAT?" then you feel unsafe. Eveiy woman expresses feeling in her own way. For one, it's five minutes of yelling. For another, it's an all night crying jag. To catch the feeling means paying attention. Sometimes, you can't handle a particular style of expression, and you can't catch that woman's feelings. You don't need to catch all the feelings that are tossed your way. To catch someone's feelings is an act of affirmation towards that person, and it should always be reciprocal. The energy that we send out is full of many thins, not just pure feeling. When we toss out an expectation, the colors are more vivid, because the emotions run so strong. Like artists naming our paintings, we begin to put our expectations into words, in the form of questions. When you ask a woman something, and she says Yes, she catches your expectation. She meets it with her own blend of color and emotion, and there is a merging, stronger than the merging of simple feelings. When she says No, the energy is suspended in the air, gradually fading, until a breeze caries it away. We become more comfortable asking things of each other, and soon we do it all the time. The freedom to say Yes or Nois sacred and joyful. No question is scorned. The asking is celebrated, because it takes courage. Every answer is celebrated. Both Yes and No take great courage. You ask a woman, "Will you sleep with me every night for the rest of my life?" If she answers No, you have several choices. You can keep asking this question of other women, until you find one who will catch your expectation. Perhaps, instead you decide to change your question. "Well, how about tonight? This time you hear Yes. Being asked odes not imply an obligation. O f course, there are risks. If one woman can't promise another a lifetime of sleeping together, she may not be interested in just one night. But we women are strong, and stay true to ourselves. We study our own desires, the bright range of our feelings. When a woman becomes angry at a question, it’s generally because she's afraid of saying No. The fear has an old history. For years, we have been taught to make do, to drown our unhappiness, to deny the thousand little mutinies. In a friendship, we catch each other's feelings in a natural and casual way. One woman talks, the other listens, and then the roles are reversed. Both feel heard, not judged. When women discover each other's bodies, the feelings are much more intense. Now you hear more than her words. You hear her body talk, and she hears yours. Your feelings are caught in a deeper and more complete way. It's a time of euphoria. Feelings come up that have been forgotten, buried, repressed. The expectations often ride along, like barnacles on a whale's back. The more feelings there are, the more you are likely to ask each other. And you want to say yes to everything your lover asks, because you want to keep catching her energy forever. This can be overwhelming, and sooner or later one woman has to say, "Stop," or "Slow down." It's the scared No, the No that friends give each other without blame. Loving another woman means celebrating her right to ask, and her right to say No. Saying No is hard, but a least it’s clear. It's much harder when the other woman constantly disappoints your expectations, but you never let her know. You're dressed up, and you want your lover to tell you how good you look. For you, looking good has a lot to do with feeling loved. But you're ashamed of feeling this way, so you say nothing and she says nothing. You feel sad, depressed or resentful. Begin by tossing the feelings towards her, and letting her catch them. This involves no obligation on her part. It's a big help to get these rough feelings out of the closet. Then ask directly for what you want: more compliments. She can catch all your feelings, and still say No. Maybe she feels it would be insincere to compliment you more. This doesn't mean she doesn't love you. She loves you enough to be clear in her answer. She may talk about her need to be spontaneous and sincere in everything she says. She's giving you a feeling to catch. This is a danger point, when talking can become a fight. You feel rejected and vulnerable and ashamed. "Are you trying to tell me that I'm insincere?" You need to recognize your pain when it's talking. Maybe you can talk about your fear of being considered insincere. If you don't get into a fight, you could find that all your feelings echo each other, and are easy for each other to catch. There's also the danger of competing - trying to figure out who's more sincere, or who's more afraid of seeming insincere. This is a side-trip down a patriarchal treadmill. At the end of an exhausting run, you find there's no Olympic award for pain. PAGE 7 1994 W ish L ist R E S O L U T IO N O R R E V O L U T IO N ? T he L R P has needs for the following item s/helpers. Please let us know if you can help. In 1994, with firm resolve, I commit to being open. I will open my eyes to see the injustices being waged around the globe. I will open my eyes to the possibility of progress. I will endeavor to not stick my head in the sand, nor believe nothing can be done. I will open my eyes to the beauty that abounds. V olunteers L aserJet IIP Folding Chairs I will open my ears to hear - another’s viewpoint, someone else’s plan, the cry for help, the call to battle, the invitation to celebrate. I will endeavor to not block out what is uncomfortable, unfamiliar, unexpected. I will open my ears to the universal symphony of discord and harmony. 10-12 cup Coffee machine I will open my heart to those who would love me. I will open my heart to those needing love. I will endeavor not to lock myself up in that inner fortress that feels so safe, yet serves to imprison. I will open myself to the exquisite joy and pain of human communion. Please call the L R P at (602) 266-5542 if you need m ore inform ation. Thanks for your help. The Views! The Whews! WREN (Women's Recreational Enjoyment Network) begins its 1994 Get In Shape While Having As Much Fun As Possible (GISWHAM-AP) Campaign with a MODERATE hike on the north side o f the Superstitions. On Saturday, January 22, we will hike the Canyon Lake Trail to the Indian Paint Mine, a round trip o f about 6.6 miles. There is a 1640' elevation gain on this trip, and the book calls the hike moderate, with a few very steep sections. It has been many years since I've hiked this trail, and I don't know if I'll have time to scout it before we go, so if you have recent information about the trail, please call me so I can better answer women's questions. My reference book describes this as a "fine" trip, with "magnificent vistas at almost every turn—views o f rocky, saguarostudded hillsides, o f the rugged Mazatzal Range" (how do you pronounce that, anyway?) "rising about Salt River Canyon, and o f the famous landmark o f Weaver's Needle..." We may also find running water in La Barge Canyon or Boulder Canyon. And, I'll be scouting this trail as a potential backpacking trip in March or April, so if you'd like to backpack, speak up! If we backpack here, we could take a 1.3 mile side trip up La Barge Creek to a "fabulously spooky box or narrows,... this bottleneck is only a few dozen yard across, with walls that rise almost vertically some 500' on either side." Ooooh! Call Lee Lawton, 990-2194, to sign up for the dayhike on January 22, or call to get your name on the backpacking list. The backpack may not be planned far enough in advance to appear in the newsletter, but I will contact you by phone, and we can coordinate schedules. Children and dogs are welcome on dayhikes. Bring at least two quarts of water and your lunch. Boots are recommended, especially in desert terrain. Wish there were more hikes? Let me know. I will open my soul to receive healing. I will open my soul to share my small flicker of light with those who seek. I will endeavor to not believe others’ condemnation of my soul. I will open my soul to the inspiration of countless tiny flames joining together in peace. I will open my mouth to speak. I will let people know who, what I am. I will speak out for equal rights and equal protection under the law. I will endeavor to not remain silent in the face of prejudice or adversity. I will open my mouth to share what I ’ve seen, heard, felt. I will speak with encouragement for others to be open. J. Katherine Benning FACTS ABOUT WOMEN The W omen’s Action Coalition (WAC) was formed in 1992 to fight injustices which deny women their rights WAC has compiled a new book, WAC STATS: Facts Ahorn This small volume packs a wallop in delivering hundreds of salient facts, with sources cited, docum enting some of the injustices and inequalities that WAC was organized to redress. The facts are grouped into about twenty categories, from “Abortion” to “Work.” Some tidbits: 1920, the year American women won the right to vote, also saw the birth of the Miss America Pageant. - From 1989 to 1990, AIDS increased 34% in women, compared to 22% in men. - Since its inception, the US Congress has had 134 women and 11,096 men. - The average prison term for killing a husband is twice as long as for killing a wife. - 71% of all rapists are repeat offenders. - At Harvard, women professors are paid $14,000 per year less than their male counterparts of equal rank. WAC Stats is compiled and edited by Andrea Blum, Julie Harrison, Barbara Ess, and Gail Vachon. Dykes to Ulatch Out Foi ■gMj^yEEP^R... | T h e y r e . s h a r in g t h e 0 * 7*5 e * p e r ienc £ 5 . . . WHEN 1 5A I0 'T'J HEAUTHV F o R US t o ACKNOWLEDGE OUR ATTRAC­ TIONS To OTHER WOMEN,I MEANT IT TAKES TWO QUESTION? TOEACH0THE&/ At least you COULDV£ t o l d m e F I R S T / LET’S 60 H A x i NE, WHAT IS THE B 10 DEA L ? So n o KtJoWS I tHiNk SHE’S CUTE., So w h a t ? i t ’s JOi t a Fu n u c r ii THINGTo MAKE MV Job less / - EU&J>yo0.ve ...G R O W IN G ... THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT IS C R E A M IN G * U5 W ITH | BEEN GOING ON A N Ti-G A y i n i t i a t i v e s a l l o v e r t h e C0 U N T f ? y /| l ik e this foRPAJS 1 WE WAVE To &Uil D Coalitions w ITH OTHER PROGPES-I r CAN'T TAKE IT ’ j i v e s / these w h it e , fun m a eu tau s t fascists I Any m o r e , will ARE WINNING Votes f r o m PEOPLE o f Color . you JUST SHUT 8 y Co NWNCIkjG 'P C M GAy S & lesbians w a n t I UP a n d e a t 11 .SPECIAL RIGHTS. ** ME HAVE 50 MUCH W'ORKt d Do / a yoOR POT PIE? I Ay, I p u k e to , Q n with Some basic ’ QUESTIONS. HOW LoNi HAVE you S ll[ ©/995 Al i Sokj BEc h D Ê L i>\5okg.y,Loi5. B u r PAULA DOEjN’r LIKE IT, AND BE51 PES, 1 WAN-r-to Tfey THIS MoNoOAMy THING p iS s á , F in e , n v w b e i 'l l Ei UALIY LEARtJ -ft? Q U IT ME55/N6 ARoUND W/fH 6 /RL5 WHo HAVEN'T flN - UHED£xPFR/a\£NTiNG VFT ...PMNNNN6 fo r t h c fu t u r e , . A l ik a , i CA n Y / i ' i/ e g o f f a work oNMy DISSERTATION OVER CHRISTMASWHX DON’T you Coaae H E R E ? . . . M IL , you DoN THAVC TO Si t A R oUnJD ALL DAy. BRiNG ONE O F yoJR."pRo7£CTS.,> — r a m N O T Pa t r o n i z i n g yo u f T E E Z I 7 , yo ore so s e n s it iv e t ‘ m A d p b o n d in g A rqqNP l if e ’s d if f ic u l t ie s . T o n i , r c a n ’t Jt a n o ■TU'S SCREAMING an y aao R£. i ’m Gon n a Co Pic k Hi m u p . WAAHAAAHAAAA WHAT A r e you DOlNG?yoU [ can ’t w e a r earplu g s ' How CAN you HEAR HIM IF SOMETHING'S REAU-y WRoNG? j LCAN still h e a r HIM, U 4 rice , m y Ju s t ta k e t h e EDGE-OFF. ANÙ SPARE ME THE LECTURE/ I WOULDN'T “ EARPLUGS IF r WAS GETTING TEN w OF PEACE AN»QUIET J^VEgy DAy AT M yO F F IC E .1 and changing ... PAGE 8 Not a half-baked idea B oston-O n Dec. 6, the M ass state H ouse and Senate passed w ithout debate, a law im posing a ban on discrim ination against gay students in public schools. Proponents say the bill w ould com bat the harassm ent that leads some gay teens to drop out or com m it suicide. Gov. W illiam W eld m ust sign the m easure, but it is believed he ÍZ7tie, fU flrts E tltf o f ¿S otll LOO... A GRAND CELEBRATION OF SISTERS HONORING SISTERS UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH 4027E. Lincoln Drive Paradise Valley, Arizona January 2, 9994, 4pm - 7pm Beontime WEAR RITUAL CLOTHES * BRING DRUMS AND RATTLES * NO CHARGE * DONATIONS ACCEPTED * BRING FINGER FOOD TO SHARE * * RSVP SHARON 274-0230 * NORMA 266-4 WOMYN ONLY * CALL FOR RESERVATIONS THE 13 DAYS OF SOLSTICE supports it. "No statute is going to change attitudes, but it's a first step in telling people that discrim ination and intolerance are not good," said Sen. R obert H avem , D -A rlington. In 1989, M assachusetts becam e the second state, after W isconsin, to enact a law banning discrim ination against gays in housing, credit and em ploym ent, but th at law didn't include public schools. "This is an incredible victory for gay and lesbian students throughout M assachusetts," said D avid LaFontain, political director o f the C oalition for Lesbian and G ay C ivil R ights. "The safety o f gay and lesbian students throughout A m erica w ill be enhanced i f other states follow M assachusetts' lead," he said. The director o f the C atholic League for R eligious and Civil R ights com plained the law is "unnecessary legislation over a contrived issue." "The ultim ate purpose here is to introduce hom osexual program s into the public schools," said C.J. Doyle.______________ MARCHING FOR FREEDOM!...... is the feature length video commemorating the 1993 March on Washington, produced in association with/benefiting the National Gay & Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF). This video addresses wide spectrum of issues ranging from Lesbian and Gay 'marriage to the military ban and the AIDS pandemic. Events covered include: the March, the Wedding, the Holocaust Vigil, the Quilt, and Civil Disobedience. Additionally, activists, politicians, musicians and comedians from the main rally stage are featured. The video which includes a companion color poster is available to members o f this organization for a special promotional price by sending $21.95 + $3 shipping payable to: Project 1993, 2020 Pennsylvania Ave., NW, Washington DC 20006. Further information is available by calling 1 800-993-1993, Real Bikes for liiomen • Small Frames always in Stock • Women’s clothing & accessories to increase your comfort • Basic bicycle mechanics for womenFree workshop last Monday of the month call to reserve space. • Beginners & questions always welcome (To the traditional tune of ”12 Days of Christmas") New words by Shekhinah Mountainwater 1. On the first day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Some healing to set me free. 2. On the second day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Gifts from my love...And some healing to set me free. 3. On the third day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me.. A helping dream... Gifts from my love.. And some healing to set me free. 4. On the fourth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me.. A branch of evergreen.. A helping dream...Gifts from my love.. And some healing to set me free. 5. On the fifth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me... Joyous song! A branch of evergreen.. A helping dream...Gifts from my love.. And some healing to set me free. 6. On the sixth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me... Greetings from my neighbors...Joyous song! A branch of evergreen.. A helping dream...Gifts from my love.. And some healing to set me free! 7. On the seventh day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me.. .Magick for the year... Greetings from my neighbors...etc. 8. On the eighth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Pine conversation... Magick for the year...etc. 9. On the ninth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Nine pearls of wisdom... Pine conversation...etc. Rock & Road Bicycles 1416 N. Scottsdale Rd., Scottsdale — in Papago Plaza 949-1137 Open M-Th, 10-7:30, Fri 10-6, Sat 10-5 and Sunday Noon-4 Home & Industrial Cleaning Specializing in deep, thorough 1SPRING" Cleaning & Odd indoor/outdoor General Up-Keep you just can't get to! Free Estimates 380-0693 10. On the tenth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Candles for the lighting... Nine pearls of wisdom...etc. 11. On the eleventh day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Deep contemplation... Candles for the Kghting...etc. JACCI CAPLIN, MSW, ACSW 12. On the twelfth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me...Showers of abundance... Deep contemplation...etc. (602) 838-7611 13. On the thirteenth day of Solstice the Goddess sent to me.. A Grand Celebration... Showers of abundance...etc. Psychotherapist Individual Therapy Adults and Children Couples Support Groups W orkshops □ 4 7 0 0 S. Mill A ve., Suite 1 Tem pe, AZ 8 5 2 8 2 □ 1 232 E. Broadway Rd., Suite 120 Tem pe, AZ 8 5 2 8 2 PAGE 9 m DEN A’S Sara Brinkerhoff, m .a ., c .a .d .a .c ., c .b .s .w . A U TO M O TIV E C LIN IC Family Systems Therapist DENA FREEM A N s p e c ia lizin g in, but not lim ited to, fa m ilie s w ith y o u n g c h ild ren T echnician 2947 E. McDOWELL RD. 273-9154 V )«J §o j O i AUGUSTE CHARLES, GRI UVQCJ) REALTOR® NOTARY 1 UJ BUS. (602) 844-5900 X4757 -J 2 RES. (602) 464-0370 oc MOBILE 1-602-541 -0708 sUJ 4677 S. LAKESHORE DRIVE TEMPE. ARIZONA 85282 U c S oJ i s 3C 1 PHOENIX, AZ 85008 Mobile: (602) 531-8176 12-step recovery oriented Idfc5> 321 W. H a tc h e r Rd., #108 P h o e n ix , A Z 85021 (602) 581-0268 Tina M. Angotti, L.M.T. Licensed and Certified ■ R I / f ^ t y “*t 0 s\j 1 Q J. ft" Ml* office: (602) 756-0486 pager: (602) 238-0839 2651 W. Guadalupe, Ste. A-219 Mesa, Arizona 85202 â Like Coming Home... 03. K> d\\s,cj ^LLman±, New Location! (6D2) 264-7427 r Faye Weatherly UJ S i z o in 00 1t § r i UNIVERSITY T a x R e t u r n